If the phrase "I'm an idiot, what's your excuse?" hadn't already been taken by Brian (well, I'm mostly interested in the first half of it, anyway), I'd grab it for myself.
I'm sick and tired of shoelaces that keep opening when I walk or exercise. You know the ones. Round, slippery. Keep coming ondone. Only laces I could find were thin, cheap ones in drugstores. Then, when I was in Sports Authority buying gym shorts Monday, I saw them. Nice, thick, flat, unslippery laces. I bought a pair and prepared to replace the slippery ones on my favorite sneakers with them. They threaded fine, if a bit tight, but the damn ends wouldn't go through the eyeholes at the end, where the laces are to be tied. Grrrrrr.... The ends are an itty fraction wider than the f'in laces the sneakers came with. So I had to put the old ones back in and will have to continue my practice of double knotting them to keep them tied any responsible amount of time. Can't these things be standardized?
And last night I dreamed I was going bald. WTF is up with that? I never dreamed anything like that before. It was... disturbing, to say the least. A balding, middle-aged woman. Not a pretty sight. I was relieved to discover this morning all my hair, dark brown and white, were all still in place. Well, I didn't count them all, but they seemed to all be there.